It’s time to consider the balance between “tight and loose” so here are a few stories for you to notice where you sit on the spectrum to find the balance for yourself. The “tight but loose” concept is something that I have found helpful for keeping my stress levels in check.
I have been working in Fremantle for over 4 years now and love my workspace at In Touch Wellness Centre. Fremantle generally has a very loose atmosphere where there is an “anything goes” kind of landscape. There are all walks of life parading the streets in their own style of clothes. Mounted police allow their horses to graze in the parks and be shared with the people on the streets. I have to say however, the atmosphere in Fremantle lately has been pensive, to say the least. Since the “black lives matter” movement, police presence has been omnipresent and stifling. There is not a day goes by that I don’t hear at least one police siren. In fact just this morning on my 30 minute walk from Fremantle to North Fremantle, there were two events where traffic was interrupted with a police vehicle frantically making its way with lights and siren blaring.
A few weeks ago, there was a feeling of the belt being tightened as I walked a few blocks to a shop just the other side of the Fremantle Mall. A brawl was occurring on a street corner, which is sadly not an unusual occurrance in Fremantle. The thing that got me thinking about the state of affairs, was the series of events that took place for me on that 10 minute walk. I passed two mounted police, then walked around the corner to confront a marked police car with lights and sirens mounting the curb to attend the brawl. A second later an unmarked police car with lights and sirens appeared around the corner as I looked back to see two police on bikes, cycling to the scene. From my left a police woman and a police man wearing bullet proof vests crossed my path on their sprint from the police station to the scene. It begged the question, “why is there such a massive police presence all of a sudden?”.
Back tracking to a few months before, when COVID was becoming the topic of concern, I stepped into a newsagent to make a purchase and was confronted with this same kind of pensive, tightly reigned atmosphere. The woman behind the desk was anxiously ordering people to stand in designated boxes and move in the allocated directions while juggling masks, gloves and the customer service tasks at hand. A man at a distanced watched over her with eyes of authority, appearing to keep a check on procedures. There was no smile, warmth or friendliness from her as I would usually experience in this country town. It was another memorable experience that again spelt out “heavy policing and tightening the belt”.
When experiences like this are loudly and boldly in the front of my mind, I like to take an enquiry into them to find the gift that is wrapped in the problem. On this vein of thinking, my recently published book “Melting Moments” is an expression of the way our challenging life experiences can be turned into moments of gold. There are so many experiences in life that give us opportunities for unwrapping the gifts inherent in the problems of life.
Through witnessing the global tightening and the sense of pressure and tightening that many clients are experiencing, it has become evident that there is learning involved with finding our balance between tight and loose. We have had tight coming at us from many angles. The COVID restrictions of social distancing, hand sanitising and suppressing our normal human behaviours of hugging and greeting with physical contact have meant that we have had to keep a tight reign on ourselves. The financial impacts of COVID have meant that many people have had to tighten the belt financially. Around the world, the increased activity of policing the streets was evident with the Hong Kong protesting and then on the streets of places enforcing lock down rules and then carried on into the black lives matter movement. That then extended into policing online material that eluded to any racial discrimination or stories involving the world’s history of exploiting the lives of the Indigenous.
I took a step back to look at the big picture and got the sense that many of us are having to tighten our belts, so to speak. The psyche is forced to tighten the belt on modulating the wild indigenous spirit that lives in us all. This wild spirit is the representative of the loose. It gives us our sense of freedom and paradoxically our sense of connection with all of life. It is untamed and necessary for our innate instincts to keep us safe and protect us in a truly threatening situation. It keeps us attuned to our own truth in order for us to live a fulfilling and meaningful life. Policies and procedures can only inform us to a certain degree. There is always going to be unique situations that policies haven’t had the chance or knowledge to figure out.
There is only so long that we can tighten the belt before we start to want to crack and impacts on our ability to breathe deeply. To take that very long and relaxing exhale is what we tend to need at these times. Here lies the opportunity. I believe that when we repattern ourselves by taking that big exhale and make a conscious choice that takes the pressure off, we are empowered to change our inner world. According to the Huna philosophies, all power comes from within.
We have the power to keep a check on how heavily we are policing ourselves.
We have the power to put pressure on ourself or not, to tighten the belt or not.
There is a lot of people suffering with anxiety at the moment and this is the beginning of the “too tight” sensations in the body. So if you are feeling the pressure, or hearing the inner critic laying down the rules and regulations it is time to take charge in a different way. If your free spirit is suffocating then it is time to take a step back and know that you have the power to adjust your inner world and your inner compass to do things differently.