I am loving the buzz around at the moment with the talk of fresh new energy, new insights, new year’s resolutions, intentions and goals. Wouldn’t it be great if we could sustain this degree of positivity, hopefulness and attention on the meaningful things in our life for the whole year? Yet I am sure many of us can identify with that nasty little saboteur that lurks about and pounces every now and then to divert us or bring us down. If you are human there will be those moments and those days. A very strong memory for me arises when I think about this. I remember my first day as a sweet and innocent little 11 year old, settling into boarding school and a picture on the wall caught my eye and my attention. It had a teddy bear sitting with several tissues scattered around and the inscription with the picture read ‘there will be days like this’. And yes indeed there was a lot of days like this and a lot of moments in that five years of rigid institutionalisation where my saboteur reared its ugly head. If I hadn’t taken charge of my saboteur and maintained my focus, I would have come out of there a lot unhappier, and I would not be the person I am today. So firstly I want to say, it is ok to have your down days and a touch of self pity and whatever other feelings arise for you on your journey to fulfilling your dreams and goals.
There are indeed moment in life when we feel like the victim and struggle to take an empowered path. So how do we stay on the path of self empowerment in crafting our life without allowing the sabotaging self to derail us?
There are a few things I have learnt to be helpful.
#1 Be absolutely clear in your intentions. If the intention/goal you have is not all that important to you or not aligned with your core values, then there will be a lot of opposition within yourself for achieving that thing. You may as well save your energy for the things that really matter.
#2 Maintain a relationship with your heart and soul as well as with the Divine/God/Spirit. Keeping open communication with these parts of yourself builds a deep sense of inner knowing and gives you very clear guidance. This kind of guidance is often opposing to the saboteur mind, so the more you give energy to your absolute truth as opposed to your mind, the more you can back yourself. I have this intention for myself this year - to let go of the mind chatter with its worries and doubts and let the miracles happen.
#3 Keep your eye on the ball - i.e, focus attention and energy into what really matters - your clearly defined goal and intention. And what also matters is how you feel about things. If you are feeling a block, a resistance, anger, frustration, fear, whatever it is, it needs to be heard. You can push it down and soldier, do the emotional eating, or any other avoidance pattern you know well and it will still be within you, draining your energy from what you really want to be putting it into. We use an incredible amount of energy to combat and compensate for our inner stresses. Muscle testing in Kinesiology consults shows a very good demonstration of this. Many people present saying how exhausted they are and when muscle tested for their energy level for healing it is 100%. Yet when muscle tested for the amount of stress they have, it is a rather high percentage, well over 50%, which is a lot of resources being spent on something you don’t want. The energy they could have available for healing or having a joyful life, is being used to hold the self together amidst the underlying, unresolved stress and trauma. So to address the sabotaging self that does not have enough energy, or likes to procrastinate with avoidance patterns, give yourself some space and time to recognise your feelings and release any physical or emotional blocks associated. It is handy to have some self healing tools to support you with the letting go process. If you are stuck with something deeply rooted or very traumatic, I would highly recommend the support of an experienced practitioner that you can trust to support you with body work or emotional release. It is also very supportive to release the everyday stresses which arise. Use of breath, movement or sounding techniques are three incredible tools for shifting stuck energy and stress from the body.
Something else which can support you to remain focused is to have a daily practice which dedicates your attention to that thing you have your heart set on. It is a bit like investing in the bank account and the old adage applies, energy flows where attention goes. To amplify it even more and get yourself some extra interest in this account, you can add in sensations of joy or pleasure with your dedicated practice. In this fashion we are working with the laws of how the body works. Neurologically when there is pleasure or reward attached to an action, it sticks better in our memory and our neurological programming and we more quickly learn to naturally do that thing or have that experience. It’s like muscle function, the more you use it the stronger it gets. The more you travel a neurological pathway ie. do that activity, the stronger that pathway becomes - yes a habit… a good habit.
What about when that saboteur is so strong, and there has been so many adversities to surmount and you feel like you have nothing left and you feel like giving up? Ridiculous as it sounds, that is something to celebrate, because it is often the moment just before the breakthrough, like that saying, “it is darkest before the dawn”. I have heard so many stories and had many moments myself where I had nothing left and gave up. You could call it surrender I guess. Sometimes the surrender/time out was for a long time, sometimes a moment. It doesn’t matter the time. The beauty in this life is that we get to choose, so there is no need to beat yourself up if you didn’t get back on that horse straight away. Whenever you take that step is ok. It’s not what you do that matters most, it is how you do it. Let your heart show you how and when.
So on this note, Simone has stepped back into teaching Nia classes to support self healing with expressive dance, martial arts and healing arts. This practice is hugely rich with principles for crafting your life and your relationship with yourself for staying focused on the things which serve you. And Michael has stepped back into holding sweat lodge ceremonies now that the opportunity has arisen at a venue in the Margaret River area. We are getting a lot of wonderful feedback about how supportive this has been for people in allowing them a space and process for healing and to become clearer in their visions and heart space.
If anything in this blog has sparked something in you which you want to share or ask about, we would love to hear from you. You don’t have to take on your saboteur all on your own. And sometimes it helps to have others around us to spot it and release it.
info@soulnurturing.com.au
Phone Simone 0427 320 302
Phone Michael 0417 534 647